So it’s been a full two weeks since I have gone to work by far the longest I have ever taken away from work. It’s normally a big deal for me to take one day. In the past two weeks my life has changed so much, the little man who lived in my girlfriend’s belly has come out and I love him even more now. Our little family is learning and growing together everyday. My heart has grown so much with our new addition, even during the trying times when I’m getting peed and pooped on or feeling completely helpless when I can’t stop the crying of my little man, I am still full of love even if the look on my face doesn’t say so. It’s definitely a growing and learning experience that I am happy to go through especially with such and wonderful partner and mother to my son, I am in awe of the power and patience of this new mom. Needless to say I am not looking forward to leaving the house in the morning but it is something I must do and I am grateful for the job I have. Definitely a new reason to come home at the end of the day, not that I needed another. It’s amazing the way life changes over very short periods of time hope all is well with you and your family.
Peace Love Das
So these days I have noticed something, I am an asshole, maybe not outwardly yet but it’s brewing and will come up if I don’t smother it with loving kindness for myself and those around me. I sure hope it has not effected those around me too bad and that I have caught it before it does so. This spiritual thing many of us do is not a one time deal, it’s an ongoing practice like mindfulness meditation. You take your time and you progress and you get better but when you loose your focus you have to return to it time and time again. The dangerous part is not that I can see this asshole way of action and behavior rearing it’s ugly head, that’s a good thing, the worry is and always will be what if I get to a point where I don’t see it and I am taking stuff out on those around me. That’s why it’s so important to be mindful of thoughts and actions to prevent suffering. So it’s another round of meditation for me before bed, maybe some chanting and I will definitely break open my copy of Creating True Peace by Thich Nhat Hanh which I strongly recommend. Hope you are all doing well on your journey tonight and practicing loving kindness towards all.
Peace Love Das
So I have been a father officially for about 38 hours so I am exhausted, tired and probably smell a bit but other than that I am just full of love for my girlfriend who is a champ and my baby boy who is oh so precious. I don’t know if I ever pictured myself in this position but there is no place I’d rather be than bouncing my son up and down. I have cried a million tears of joy since yesterday. 38 hours in is a fraction of a step on this long journey buy I am very happy to have started.
Peace Love Das
In the next few short days I will hold the greatest amount of potential I have ever in the form of my first born son. Its crazy I already have so much love in my heart for him and he is still an inside baby at this point. I have been thinking a lot about the potential and hope that a new born life holds, these little beings hold all the hope for the future. I think its more about what we dont teach our young then what we do, think if every parent stopped teaching hate or racism not only with there words, but more importantly, with there actions. What if we were to show these little beings to help eachother more and to come together in community. There really is endless potential with our youth, really with all of us, but to be able to adjust sails earlier in life can change the outcome immensely. Hope im up to the task, we shall see.
peace love das